log date 6-21-xx
by Axletia Rosonetis
Summary: Steven has many moms, and they don't always get along, especially after being his sworn enemies. He just wishes they can all just get along. Redemption arc AU.
1. Chapter 1

_friendship_

 _(Original notes: nothing relevant)_

 _Originally written June 21st, 2015 on tumblr. I wrote this before Peridot and Lapis actually had their redemption arc, so looking back at this over a year later, it's fun to see the differences between what I wrote and what crewniverse developed. I'm still thinking of adding new chapters maybe, and I wouldn't change my universe but probably add more of the deeper details to blend better._

 _Idk I just remember what I wrote for this was really fun. So, I hope you kids are in for a fun ride as well. c:_

* * *

Steven couldn't help but constantly shift his gaze between his bedroom to the couch. It had only been about a week since he and the other gems had defused Malachite and picked up a relatively remorseful Peridot along the way, but tensions were still high. Jasper was still nowhere to be found, Lapis was still recovering, and Peridot…Peridot was rather difficult.

Well, it couldn't be helped. Earlier in the week, Garnet reminded him that it would take some time for either of their new comrades to trust them, but he wanted to try and be friends with Peridot. If she could stop doing bad things, then he was sure they could be friends! Only…she seemed to hate everything.

Well, that was okay, too. He was sure that she'd stop hating everything eventually…maybe. Hoping to change her mind, he walked over to the couch and sat next to her. "Hi, Peridot!"

Ever grim-faced, Peridot took one look at him and sharpened her frown. "Oh…it's you. Steven. What do you want?"

"Whatcha thinkin' about?"

"Hmmm? I'm thinking about how Jasper will kill us all if she decides to track us down."

"Oh." Steven's smile dropped. Even though he only had a glimpse of Jasper's personality, he was still pretty terrified of seeing an angry buff gem. But one of them had to be brave; if he was brave, maybe Peridot would feel a little more comfortable. "Yeah, Jasper's pretty scary. But you're with us now! We'll protect you!"

" _Scary_? You don't even know what kind of atrocities Jasper has committed, but you wouldn't understand even if I told you about them. I wouldn't _expect_ you to understand. You live in such a naive, primitive world…I suppose it would be best to keep you in the dark."

"Thanks?"

Peridot huffed, crossing her arms. "I don't know why Lapis is so willing to embrace this Earth culture. For one thing, she'd heal a lot faster if she just went back into her original state. But _no_ , she always has to be so difficult and decide to rest in one of you human nests instead. And _sleep_ ! It's so illogical! Why would you want to waste time sleeping when there's so much work to be done?" Sighing, the green gem glanced at the bedroom with disapproval before suddenly jabbing Steven in the chest with one of her fingers. "And another thing, Steven. If I'm supposed to indulge in this human concept called friendship, why does _that one_ keep watching us? You already told them I'm not a criminal."

"Well…"

"Well, what?"

They both shifted their attention to the kitchen, where Pearl was glaring in their direction, the rest of her face buried in a newspaper. Garnet wasn't too worried since Lion was around and Steven was a bigger boy, and Amethyst was also confident that Steven could take care of himself, but Pearl made it very clear on the first day that she didn't trust either of their new boarders. With Lapis she was pretty on the fence, but she had even made it clearer that she did not trust Peridot. At all. In fact, for the first three days, she was pretty insistent on jailing her.

But Steven didn't really want to reaffirm that idea, either. Friendship had to start somewhere. "Well, Pearl is just protective. She'll warm up to you eventually."

" _Absolutely_ not, _Steven_!"

Steven let out a nervous chuckle. Peridot looked even grimmer. Quickly, he waved his hands and looked away from the kitchen. "You don't need to worry, Peridot. Really. Everyone makes mistakes. My dad has this saying, _'If every pork chop were perfect, we wouldn't have hot dogs!'_ Yeah, you made some mistakes and you're a hot dog, but you can make yourself taste good! I believe in you!"

"I don't understand, Steven. What's a hot dog? And are you implying that I am edible and that you want to eat me? I thought most of humankind had outgrown cannibalism a long time ago. Really, you're making Earth culture sound so barbaric."

By now Pearl had stomped over to them, a finger already pointing in the air, and before Steven knew it she and Peridot were arguing…again. Why wasn't it easier to fix mistakes? Yes, he knew that Peridot had done a lot of bad things in her past…but hadn't the other Crystal Gems been involved in dark things, too? Pearl and Garnet and Amethyst…and they turned out okay now. His mom wouldn't let them stay bad forever. And if Rose were alive too, he was sure she wouldn't let Lapis and Peridot stay bad forever, either.

He wished he could make everyone feel better. He didn't like to see them argue.

"It's not like I _asked_ to be here!" Peridot was shouting, her hands flailing around in the air. "You three and Steven just think you can do anything and save the world and everything will be so happy and carefree and peaceful! Well, you know, before I met you gems _I_ had a promising future in Homeworld! I was going to make so many droids and build so many spaceships, and we were going to conquer this dumb, primitive planet, but you just _had_ to stop us!"

"Of course we had to stop you!" Pearl shouted back. "You think we're going to just _allow_ Homeworld to conquer another planet and kill and enslave everything in sight?! I don't want you here, either! Steven's still just a boy, and he doesn't understand how long we've been fighting against you!"

"Well, why don't you make him into not a boy?! He'll get you killed one day! He'll…he'll get _me_ killed, too, if I stay any longer-"

" _Will you shut UP, Peridot?!_ "

Everyone stopped as Lapis limped into the living room, water wings thrashing from her back. Steven jumped from his seat, putting a hand on her wrist. "Lapis! You should still be in bed!" he cried.

"I'm fine, Steven." Turning to Peridot she pointed a finger at her, then to Pearl. "You two! You keep having the same argument over and over, but Steven's shown us that friendship can save us over and over again! I don't quite understand it myself, but I'll learn! So, you two, _be friends faster!_ Let's go, Steven."

Pearl and Peridot were speechless. Steven looked between them, then at Lapis. "Go? Go where? Shouldn't…shouldn't we calm them down or something?"

"Outside. Let's _go_ , Steven."

Lifting him into the crook of her arm, Lapis made her way to the exit, slamming the door behind them. On the top of the roof was Amethyst, who was laughing with half-crushed chips in her mouth. "Awww, man, what were they fighting about now?" she asked, chuckling. "Hey, Lapis, if you're gonna take Steven out for a walk, be sure to have him home by supper! I think Garnet's bringing home pizza."

"Uh, sure."

As Steven was carried off towards the beach, he hoped Pearl and Peridot wouldn't hurt each other while they were gone. He hoped Peridot would feel more at ease eventually. She still said some pretty hateful things, but that still didn't make her a bad gem. She just needed time. They all did.

He also hoped he and Lapis would be back before Garnet. If she was bringing back pizza, it would be best to eat it warm.


	2. Chapter 2

_pizza_

They laid side by side, watching the clouds change shape while calm, ocean waves lapped at their feet. Steven liked watching clouds; he sometimes did it with Connie, and they always had fun deciphering the different shapes. But he could do it quietly, too, imagining more Steven Jrs and Lions amongst the clouds, and it was peaceful.

Lapis seemed more relaxed now, too. Her eyes were shut, her breathing shallow. Steven almost thought she had fallen back asleep, but soon enough her eyes were open again, so wide and blue. She stared at him, and suddenly the earlier conversation with Peridot entered his brain. "Hey, Lapis?"

"Hmmm?"

"Why haven't you return to your gem state to heal your wounds? I know bed rest can be really great, but wouldn't being in your gem state be quicker?"

"Don't really trust it. If _you_ were trapped in a mirror for a long time and then forced to fuse with some big, orange bully, I don't think you'd want to transform back to your gem state either," Lapis replied, a bitter smile on her lips. "Besides, I like dreaming. They're mostly bad dreams, though. I keep replaying over and over again being fused as Malachite, and when I wake up from those dreams, I want to tear myself from the inside-out, if I only I could forget about it. But…"

"Buuut…?"

Lapis's eyes softened. "The good dreams were about you, Steven, and they give me hope."

"Peridot seems pretty scared of Jasper. Is she really that bad?"

"Your friends would say yes. In Homeworld she'd be revered as one of the superior beings. But I'm not at liberty to judge. You've seen her. You'd have to use your own judgment on what to think of her."

Steven hugged himself. He _did_ think Jasper was scary, but he still wasn't sure whether to truly call her a bad gem. After all, Lapis and Peridot could be considered to be bad gems at one point, and now there they were. Lapis seemed to echo his thoughts as she continued. "To be honest, Steven, I'm not sure if me and Peridot should stay with you. I know you're just trying to help, but I'm afraid you'll see the ugly side of me. I'm afraid I'll…hurt you."

"But you won't mean it!" Steven exclaimed, suddenly sitting up on the sand. "We're friends, aren't we? Beach summer fun buddies? If you're sad, I'll cheer you up, and if you're mad we can talk things out, and I know you and Peridot and Pearl and Garnet and Amethyst don't really trust each other much, but we can work things out! I promise!"

"But how can I live with myself if I hurt you, Steven?"

Her words were lost to him as he wrapped his arms around her stomach, hugging her. He felt his own gem emanate a warm, glowy feeling; he wished his shield could protect her mind as well as her body. Soon Lapis began stroking his hair, her touch feeling like warm bath water. "I'm sorry, Steven," she murmured. "I know you mean it. We're beach summer fun buddies, aren't we?"

He sniffled. "Y-Yes."

"Let's talk about something else. Earlier Amethyst mentioned something about Garnet possibly bringing home pizza? Is that something you eat?"

Steven moved his face away from her stomach and nodded, wiping away the snot with the back of his hand. "Yeah. Pizza day's great. It's the only food we all eat together. Pearl really doesn't like eating, and Garnet mostly eats a lot of meat and vegetables, and Amethyst eats everything _but_ vegetables. I'd think you'd like it."

"And Peridot?"

"Uhhh…."

Lapis chuckled. "Never mind. Why don't we head back?"

"Okay."

They held hands as they walked back, and Steven felt better. He was glad that Lapis would stay for the time being, and Peridot, too, even if Peridot was still hard to get along with in the smallest manner. If it was Pizza Night, though, he hoped they could all get along, at least just this once.

Sure enough, when they arrived at the house, they were greeted by the familiar smells of pizza with assorted toppings. Peridot was still sitting on the couch, but now surrounding her with some of the broccoli stalks that Pearl had bought from the grocery store for him earlier that week. She seemed to be muttering to the vegetables, but Garnet waved him and Lapis over, already eating a slice of pizza. "Hey, Steven. Lapis," she greeted. "Don't worry about Peridot. She's entertained."

Amethyst snickered, showing melted cheese between her teeth. "Yeah, she's been talking to them ever since Pearl brought the bowl out. What a weiiir~dooo."

Pearl puffed out her cheeks, stabbing her slice of pizza with a knife and fork. "I meant for her to _eat_ the broccoli, since she didn't want any pizza. I didn't expect her to be the type that plays with her food."

"Or talks to her food."

"Amethyst!" Pearl turned to them, letting her cool gaze settle on Lapis for a long time before switching sights to Steven. "We worked things out…for now, and we came to an agreement."

Steven was hopeful. "Oh?"

"We don't like each other."

"Oh…"

Garnet shrugged, shaking her head as she dropped the pizza box into Steven's hands. "We can't all get along all the time. Don't worry about it, Steven. Have some pizza. You've earned it."

"Thanks, Garnet!" Reminded of Pizza Night again, Steven looked up at Lapis with brightened eyes. "Pizza Night's great, Lapis! If I make sure to eat all my vegetables every day at dinner, Garnet usually gets us pizza at the end of the week…well, as long we're not on a mission."

"Steven's a growing boy," Pearl added, nodding. "He needs to have a balanced diet in order for his human side to be big and strong."

"Yeah! I'm a big boy!"

"You sure are. Now eat your pizza before it gets cold." Suddenly she turned back to Lapis, holding a broccoli stalk in her hands. "Lapis, this is broccoli. I know eating can often be gross and unsettling, but if you're planning on staying here, you have to learn our rules. If you want to participate in Pizza Day, you have to eat some vegetables first. This is the only stalk I have for you, since _someone_ took the rest and won't return it, but it'll have to do. Don't cheat like Amethyst does, either."

"Hey!"

Lapis frowned, looking at the broccoli stalk with uncertainty. "Um, if it's okay with you, I think I'll just not eat."

"It's not okay," Garnet said, pressing her lips together. "It's Pizza Night. Do it for Steven."

"Yeah, all you gotta do is swallow it," Amethyst added, shrugging. "It's really gross, but the pizza is worth it."

"Amethyst, you're supposed to _chew_ your food."

"It's all going to the same place, Pearl. Don't be such a mom."

The broccoli stalk still in Pearl's hands, Lapis gingerly took it, then sniffed it. "Um, okay. For Steven," she said, wrinkling her nose.

Opening her mouth she dropped the stalk onto her tongue and slowly chewed it, finally swallowing it after a few seconds with a shudder. Steven almost dropped the pizza box, ecstatic with pride, but before he could offer her a slice of pizza, Peridot was on them both, broccoli stalks in both of her hands. She glared at Lapis. "You. You! What have you done?!" she demanded, flailing her hands. "Did you just eat one of our comrades?!"

Lapis looked at her, exasperated. "It's food. It tastes gross."

In an instant Peridot's hands were around the blue gem's shoulders, and she began shaking her. "Well, spit it out! Spit. it. out! They're our comrades whom I will lead and escape with from this horrible planet! _Spit it out!_ "

"Get _off_ of me, Peridot!" Lapis snapped, jerking her shoulders away from Peridot's hands. "It's just broccoli! They can't do anything besides taste gross!"

Looking up between the two gems, Steven took out a slice of pizza from the box and handed it to Peridot. "Hey, Peridot, why don't you try some pizz-"

"I don't _want_ any of your Earth sustenance, Steven!"

Suddenly the pizza slice was knocked to the floor. Peridot took a step back, lightly blushing, and Amethyst was already upon the fallen, forever devoted to the five-second-rule and claim. Stuffing the slice in her mouth, she shook her head at the green gem. "You shouldn't wasth food, Perthidot," she said, tsking.

Pearl looked angry, and Garnet looked like she was about to ground someone. Before things blew up into another full-scale argument, Lapis slid a hand on top of the pizza and yanked off a slice for herself. "I think we better eat now, Steven."

"Yeah…"

Peridot was already running to the door, Pearl and Garnet after her with Amethyst on their heels, while Steven and Lapis quietly took their seats and began eating. He hoped every Pizza Night wouldn't be like this. Pizza Night was his favorite night…and maybe Peridot would decide to partake in some pizza some other night…if Garnet ever ungrounded her. He almost felt down again until he saw Lapis take another piece of pizza. When their eyes met, she turned away, blushing. "It's good," she mumbled, letting the tomato sauce drip from her hands. "Don't let Peridot ruin Pizza Night."

"Oh, don't worry, Lapis. Nothing can ruin Pizza Night!"

He wouldn't lose hope. Everyone loved Pizza Night. One day Peridot would try pizza, he was sure of it.

* * *

 _(Original notes: nothing relevant)_

 _Originally written June 22nd, 2015 on tumblr. Peridot will get the hang of things...eventually._


	3. Chapter 3

_video games_

 _(Original notes: Fake teaser: Lapis will one-hit KO you with her falcon punch.)_

 _Originally written June 23rd, 2015. Y'gotta love gems who love the video games._

* * *

Steven grabbed the video game console from the cabinets and began plugging its cords into the television. On the new top bunk, Lapis stared down at him, dangling her legs back and forth as she looked curious. Since they had some time after dinner to play, he decided that they could play the video game that his dad had got for him in a trade with Onion's dad. Somewhere Peridot was still running from the three other gems for wasting pizza, but if they all got back early enough, he hoped they could join them, too. Super Smash Bros. allowed up to four people to play.

At least he had Lapis to play with this time. Lately the other gems and Connie were too busy to play with him, and it wasn't as fun playing a fighting game with only one real player. She seemed interested too, finally hopping off her bed when the start-up screen began blinking. "So, Steven, I know I agreed to play this video game with you, but why do we have to fight each other again?" she asked.

"To have fun!"

Lapis just blinked. Steven didn't need her to say anything to understand what she was thinking. "Oh! Oh, we're not _really_ fighting each other! Well, we are…but…we're not getting hurt! Well, we are…but…our characters come back to life again! Uh. It's supposed to be fun?"

"As long as we're not really hurting each other. So what do we do?"

Relieved that Lapis understood him, Steven let out a small sigh and grinned. "Well, first we have to pick out our characters. There are sixteen characters to choose from. I'm usually Jigglypuff. He's the pink one with the big, blue eyes."

"Oh, it's cute. So I can pick any of the other characters?"

"Yeah! Just use these buttons to go up and down, and you can select. No rush. Just take your time."

While Lapis grew adjusted to the video game controls and took her time in searching through the characters, they could hear the front door slam. Seconds later Amethyst popped into the room, making her way to sink into Steven's bed, facefirst. When she turned around, Steven offered her the third control. "Hey, Amethyst. Wanna play Smash with us?"

"Nah. I think the chase wore me out." Amethyst stretched out her arms and turned into a kitten, rolling a full 360 before meowing. "It was funny chasing Peridot for a while, but it got boring fast. Pearl and Garnet are still going at it. Dunno why, though. Throwing down pizza isn't that big a deal, and I got her piece."

Steven's eyes lowered. "They're not too mad at her, are they?"

"What, do you think they're gonna knock her off the cliff for punishment or something?"

" _What?!_ "

"Relax, Steven. They're just in the heat of the moment. Now give me a belly rub, you dork."

He sighed and rubbed Amethyst's belly, allowing her to dig her claws into his skin. Lapis threw down her controller with a smirk on her face, the screen settling onto a tall man with a helmet over his head. "Steven, you think Captain Falcon's a fighter?"

"I don't see why not. I think he suits you."

Amethyst placed her paws over Steven's hand, glancing at Lapis. "Whoooo~a. You gonna destroy Steven in Smash?"

"…isn't that the point?"

"Duh. And don't go easy on him just 'cause he's a giant pink furry, either. We bite."

Seconds later the door slammed again, and Peridot could be heard muttering loudly as she made her way to the bedroom doorway. "-can't believe they're making me _eat_ the broccoli. I thought they supported earth morals, but noooo, when it comes to _my_ green comrades, I have no choices but to make sacrifices! Well, they can't make me eat them. I refuse. I have earth rights now!"

She stopped, looking at Steven from a moment before frowning. "Steven. What are you doing now?"

"Me and Lapis are about to play Smash. It's a video game. Wanna play with us?"

"Video game? Did you say video game?" Suddenly Peridot stepped forward, looking either very disinterested or very suspicious. Or both…probably both. "We had video games in Homeworld. They were highly sophisticated simulations, meant to strengthen our best skills. Is this like a simulation, Steven?"

"I'unno. We're fighting for fun."

"Ah. A combat simulation, then." Steven didn't mean to look surprised, but he was definitely thrown off-guard when she took the third control from him. He still couldn't read her expression, either. "I'm not the best fighter, but I will show off my superior skills by fighting the both of you with the puniest human I can find. Yes…this one will do. Ness. I will fight your giant rabbit and angry bird man with this Ness. Prepare yourselves."

"Whoooooo~a, Peridot, you talk so much for someone who got grouuun~deeeed."

"Somehow I think you're making fun of me, but you are not a part of this battle, so I will let that slide. Let us begin this combat simulation, Steven, Lapis."

The three of them sat side by side in front of the television, Steven between Lapis and Peridot, Amethyst curled up by his feet, watching. As they began the first game, he noticed that besides the broccoli incident, this was probably the first time Peridot was happy about something. She kept yelling at Ness on the screen, and then she kept yelling at Lapis's character, Captain Falcon, but Steven thought that he almost saw a faint smile tug on the corners of her face. She seemed into Smash.

Or maybe he just imagined her smiling. By the time the fifth or sixth round came about, he had to take a break, not being able to keep up with them anymore. Lapis seemed to be taking a thousand years' worth of aggression onto creating a full-scale battle with Ness (she had won four games thus far), and Peridot was screaming a bunch of alien words at anyone who would listen to her. Maybe she was good at other video games on her home planet, but she…honestly wasn't that good at Smash. Or maybe it was just Ness. She didn't keep the little guy in one place for too long, and that was probably a bad thing, as it hindered their attacks.

Finally Garnet came in, ignoring the two battling gems as she looked down at Steven. "Steven, it's almost time for bed. Why aren't you playing your video game with them?"

"Oh, it's kinda hard with three people…gems. I wanted to take a break anyway." That was when the idea popped into his head, and he jumped up, knocking Amethyst out of her catnap. "Hey, Garnet, why don't you join us? We can have a team battle, two on two." He raised up his eyebrows. "You could be Kirby."

"Is that the one who eats everything?"

"Yeah!"

"Hmmm…..okay. But then you gotta go to bed."

"Yeah!"

Lapis and Peridot ended their round with an angry finish, Lapis winning again, and then Garnet joined them as they picked teams. Steven was on Garnet's team as the two pink fighters, and Lapis was on Peridot's team. Garnet hadn't played too many video games since the incident at Funland that almost killed him and Pearl and Amethyst, but when she played she was always pretty focused. He was sure they'd make a great team.

He was right as hours passed and they kept playing again and again until Peridot threw her controller across the room in frustration and pointed at Lapis. "You! I thought you were good at this!" she hissed.

"I'm putting all of my effort into this!" Lapis snapped back. "Why don't _you_ put _any_ amount of effort into this?!"

"What?! Steven. Switch with me. You can have Lapis."

"Don't make Steven switch if he doesn't want to!"

"You just want to drag me down as a sore loser! Steven… _please_ switch. No!."

"I'm not switching Steven out," Garnet denied, turning her head to Peridot. "We're the Pink Fighting Buddies. And don't damage the equipment."

"…sorry….please?"

"No."

Finally Pearl came in, looking at the clock with a gasp. "Steven, what are you still doing up? It's past midnight!"

Steven yawned, finally becoming aware that he _was_ feeling pretty sleepy. Garnet stood up and unplugged the television with one yank of her wrist, causing the screen to turn black. "Sorry. We were playing video games." Turning to Steven she smiled. "Okay, Steven. Brush your teeth and put on your PJs and go to bed. We won't make you floss tonight."

"But flossing's good for all of his teeth. That string's supposed to make them minty fresh," Pearl countered, crossing her arms. "But it _is_ pretty late. Okay, Steven. No flossing tonight, but you make sure to floss twice tomorrow."

"Okay. Night, Peridot. Night, Lapis."

He followed Pearl to the bathroom, ignoring Peridot arguing with Garnet over the video game. As he followed through his nighttime routine, he honestly couldn't remember much of anything after that, the sudden feeling of exhaustion overwhelming him as he struggled to keep his eyelids open. It had been a long day, but it had also been a fun one, and they made progress. Peridot didn't hate everything anymore…he thought. And Lapis was up again, and he was glad they could have fun together, too.

His yawns growing louder, he was grateful when Pearl led him back to bed and tucked him in, kissing him on the forehead with a final 'good night'. Tonight he was sure to have good dreams. His dreams were usually so vivid and fun, and sometimes they involved Lion driving, but he guessed that was okay because it was a dream? And he could've sworn that in this round of dreaming there was loud noises and loud shouting, but he couldn't really tell amongst the roaring ocean waves and Cookie Cat and Lion and Connie and everyone else in his dream.

He was happy.


	4. Chapter 4

_breakfast_

 _(Original notes: Fake teaser: pericopter for all of your slicing and dicing needs.)_

 _Originally written June 26th, 2015. This is the last chapter I've written for this, but I think I'll continue this...probably. I need to review some eps first, though (because divergence) and while a weekly schedule would be nice..school sucks, so that is highly improbable. So stay tuned on this exciting adventure, yaaay._

* * *

Sunlight poured into Steven's bedroom through the wide window as it indicated morning, and the boy yawned, rubbing his eyes. Since he had another bed above him now, the sunshine wasn't as bright and created shadows instead, but his tummy rumbled, telling him to wake up anyway. Another day was ahead of him.

It was only when he set his feet down on the floor that he realized something was wrong. Water puddles usually didn't surround his bed, did they? No. Puddles were always supposed to be outside only, no matter how many times Amethyst tried to convince him otherwise. And this time there were two giant puddles - one that led to and dripped over the stairs, and one that led to where the television was…

Steven rubbed his eyes again. His video games and consoles were now sitting on his dresser, but there was no TV.

Well, this was certainly a pickle.

Glancing up at the top bunk, he noticed that Lapis was sleeping again, her arms and legs sprawled out across her bed, and he sensed that even if she was up, she probably wouldn't be the best one to ask about the missing TV…or the water puddles. She was pretty self-conscious about her water powers, and the puddles could've been a complete coincidence. The roof was known to leak before on super-rainy days.

He reassured himself with this thought, but when he finally went downstairs for breakfast, he realized that it probably didn't rain last night. No one was talking, and Pearl was cooking way too many pancakes for him and Amethyst, a tell-tale sign that something happened. She only made too much breakfast when she was upset. Garnet drank her coffee and read the newspaper without a word, and even Amethyst was trying her best to wolf down her second or third bowl of cereal in a quieter fashion than usual.

 _Did Jasper-_

"Steven!"

Pearl almost dropped the scorching hot pan on her feet as Peridot's voice called from the living room. Steven felt like one of those seagulls that Lion liked to pounce upon from time to time; he wasn't sure how to react and to whom he should react at first without turning breakfast into another clash. Since Pearl was working with hot kitchen appliances, he decided that Peridot was the safer bet and walked to the couch, looking up at the green gem with uneasiness. "Uh, good morning, Peridot."

"Good morning, Steven. We had an accident last night."

Garnet grunted beneath her newspaper; Pearl added another pancake to the pan. Steven winced but still hoped for the least worst outcome. "Oh. Was anyone hurt?"

"Steven, your TV is totaled, dude!"

The other gems glared at Amethyst, who began laughing between slurps of cereal milk. It was the last straw. Turning off the burners, Pearl wiped her hands with a dishrag and angrily hooked it back in place before stomping off to her room. Before Steven could go after her, Garnet raised her hand, shaking her head. "Let her cool off, Steven. She's had a rough night," she said, setting aside the newspaper. Giving a look at Peridot, who promptly cast aside another potential rebuttal, she pointed to outside, where the television sat upside-down on the porch, as sopping wet as the bedroom floor. "Peridot wanted to play more Smash after you went to bed. She got into a fight with Lapis, and she lost. She's grounded from video games for a thousand years."

"Yeah, and Pearl's just upset 'cause we just let the mess like that all night," Amethyst added, shrugging. "It was a huuuuuge commotion already. You must've been pretty tired to sleep through that, buddy."

Steven sighed. "Oh. Well, that's a relief. Do you think Pearl would mind if I had some of those pancakes? I think the bottom ones are done."

Garnet looked at the pan, then took the bottom three pancakes and plopped them onto a plate, which she handed to Steven along with the maple syrup. "Nah."

As he sat down and began eating, he felt the surrounding tension melt away. Garnet and Amethyst exchanged a few jokes that went over his head, and Peridot got up and stood by the doorway for a long time until Pearl returned, her rage also melted away. Patting him on the head as she walked past him, she turned on the sink and washed her hands, turning her head to them. "So, we have that mission today. Which one of us is going to stay behind and go with Steven to buy another TV?"

Amethyst made a face. "Not me. I don't wanna miss the action this time. Just ask Greg to do it."

"The only thing Greg is good at is fixing things, and he can't even fix _this_ TV. Said on the phone that you can't mix water and electrical things. Typical human attitude. If it was his van, he could probably fix it."

"Pearl," Garnet said, shaking her head. "Greg's fine. But someone should still probably go with them. He gets distracted easily. Lapis is still recovering, and this is an important mission, so that leaves…"

She let her sentence hang as they all glanced at Peridot, who now looked more annoyed than ever. There was a brief period of silence, and finally, she threw up her hands in exasperation. "I get it. I'll go with Steven to replace the television I helped destroy. What's a Greg?"

* * *

Steven ran up to his dad and threw his arms around his belly. Greg chuckled and ruffled his hair. "Hey, son. I hear we gotta go TV shopping today. Well, we can make the best of this and have an adventure, right? Um."

He stopped to notice Peridot, who glared at him with a deep frown on her face. Chuckling nervously, he bent down and cupped his hand over Steven's ear. "Son, isn't that the gem who had that scary spaceship a while back?" he whispered.

"Yeah. Dad, this is Peridot. She's good now. She's coming along to help us shop."

"Oh, boy." Greg stood back up to full height and extended his hand. "Well, hi. My name is Greg. I'm Steven's dad."

"You smell like motor oil. I suppose it's not the worst fragrance I've smelled on this planet. Steven, what am I supposed to do with this Greg's hand? He's pointing it at me like I'm supposed to do something to him." Squinting at Greg she scrunched up her face. "Is your hand wounded? Do you need me to amputate it or something? I suppose since you're _Steven's_ dad…not sure I know what a dad is, but whatever…here, let me get my blades running."

Peridot's fingers shook, then began quickly spinning in typical pericopter fashion. Greg made a nervous noise in his throat, and Steven made a stopping motion with his hands. "Wait, Peridot! It's just a greeting!" he cried. "You're just supposed to shake his hand! It's…it's what you do when you first meet someone."

The pericopter blades stopped as quickly as they had started. Both Steven and Greg let out a deep sigh of relief, and Peridot shook her head, yanking Greg's hand to her and shaking it. "There. Earth greeting completed. Don't make me do this with all of your human comrades, Steven. His hand is sticky."

"I just had breakfast…"

"You humans and your constant need for sustenance. Steven, why do we need him to retrieve another television? I didn't think that human technology was that radically different from Homeworld's to need someone else's assistance…"

Greg looked uncomfortable, and Peridot seemed to like him even less than she did the other gems, if that was even possible. Steven looked back and forth between them, his lips pressed together in thought. It would be a long adventure.


	5. Chapter 5

_friends_

 _Fake teaser: "F is for fire that burns down the whole town! U is for uranium…bombs! N is for no survivors when you-"_

 _Last time…Peridot broke the television, rip._

* * *

The Universe van had been in the family since…well, Steven didn't know, but he _did_ know that according to his dad's stories, it'd been around at least since his parents met. That was probably about…fifty years ago? No, maybe forty? His dad wasn't as old as Steven thought he was, he was pretty sure about that. But the van was the finest of relics. Sure, it had more of its downs than ups lately, and Pearl had actually made it _better_ with her advanced engineering skills, but it was still part of the family, lack of airbags and air-conditioning and working radio and all.

On the other hand, Peridot was…well, she wasn't a part of the family yet. And Greg was the most easygoing adult Steven knew, but he was afraid that even his dad had a breaking point.

He knew he should've taken one for the team and just sat in the back like a good boy, but he wanted to listen to his dad's tunes and his dad and feel the warm air from outside breeze through his hair. Instead, he was in the front, and Peridot was doing everything she can to make Greg drive off the road by kicking his seat every five seconds.

"You humans and your primitive earth transportation are too slow," she was saying, pushing those green boots of hers against the middle of Greg's seat. "A speed limit of 45 miles per hours? Ha! My spaceship could go to the equivalent of 4500 earth miles per _second_! And that's _if_ you abide with intergalactic space traffic laws. No _wonder_ it took you earthlings millennia just to get an aircraft up in space! Hahaha!"

Steven's eyes slowly shifted to the left. Greg kept one hand steady on the road while he turned up the volume to his CD player. He was doing that every time Peridot made some snarky comment like that. It probably wasn't good for their ears. "So, schmookums, what kind of TV do you think you want?!" he shouted.

"Uhhh, I'unno!" Steven shouted back. It was getting harder and harder to hear anything. "Something like the old one?! We didn't have to drive all the way out to Great Buy for a new one!"

"That's okay! Your old TV was gettin' old anyway! We got that for you when you were still just a baby!"

"Ohhhh!"

Peridot kicked Greg's seat again. The volume was turned up again. It was getting close to the maximum. Steven put his arm against the armrest and leaned his head, shutting his eyes. If he thought about this as another mission, it wasn't the worst experience in the world. He just imagined that Garnet and Pearl deputized him to be the leader this time, and all he had to do was get a TV back to the house in one piece. Peridot's instigating aside, that shouldn't be too hard…

*kickkickkick-*

" _SOME. SAY I HAVE NO DIRECTION. THAT I'M A LIGHT-SPEED DISTRACTION. THAT IT'S A KNEE-JERK REACTION-_ "

…right?

* * *

Steven didn't shop at the Great Buy often. While it was huge and had all of the electronic needs bundled in one place, he always preferred to shop at the local businesses. Besides, it was located on the other side of Beach City, and Lion only ever liked being a taxi when either food was involved or there was some impending doom that he had to show his master.

Oooor that time he dragged Steven halfway across the sewers just to chase a stray dog. That was a stinky meatball.

The giant blue and yellow logo loomed over them. Steven reached for Greg's hand and held it as they walked through the automatic doors. As soon as they stepped inside, Peridot ran to the shopping carts and pointed at them. "What is the function of these old, rusty baskets?"

Greg grabbed the nearest cart. Steven pointed to it. "The carts? Oh, that's where we put our stuff in while we're shopping. You didn't have shopping carts in Homeworld?"

"Why would we depend on such heaps of junk? We have the technology to pay and transport our shopping lists with one click of a scanner." Peridot's eyes narrowed. "And you have to actually _push_ the cart? On Homeworld manual labor is only done by the _laborious_ gems, like amethysts or rubies."

She walked ahead of them. Before Steven could go after her, Greg placed a hand on his shoulder and knelt down to his height. "Hey, buddy, if we lose her now she can be someone else's responsibility," he murmured. "I don't think the Crystal Gems would mind too much, either."

It was a tempting offer. Lapis didn't seem to be the type to be high-maintenance, and she'd probably assimilate with the other gems eventually. Who knew if Peridot would ever be able to get along with them? On the other hand, though, there was always the possibility of her obliterating Beach City if they let her to her own devices. It was probably wise to keep her on a short leash for now.

He shook his head and pushed Greg and the cart forward. "If every pork chop were perfect, we wouldn't have hot dogs," he finally said. "Even Peridot."

They passed through aisles of expensive-looking sound equipment and computers and old DVDs on clearance for five dollars. All of the televisions would be in the back, but before that was the video games. While Steven didn't want to buy any today because Great Buy's video games were a lot more expensive than the used ones he got at GameYield, browsing wouldn't hurt while they were there. Squeezing Greg's hand he gave his dad the look with shiny stars in his eyes. It was met with a small laugh. "Yeah, go ahead, kiddo. I'm gonna see if it's time to invest in a DVD player yet."

No matter where he went, Steven was always impressed the most with the video games selection. It was a magical place that brought all of Beach City together, no matter if they were human or gem. Peedee liked Smash and Pokemon. Sadie liked Tomodachi Life. Even Mayor Dewey bought a knock-off version of this popular racing game for him and Buck once. Steven happily wiggled his toes; he was glad he was no longer grounded from video games. Books were amazing, but he also enjoyed the mindless button-smashing every once in a while.

When he reached the Nintendo amiibos, he saw Ronaldo examining some games on the other side and waved, calling out, "Hey, Ronaldo!"

The teenager jumped, startled, but gave a small wave in return. "Oh, hi, Steven," he greeted. "Are you planning anything sinister with your caresneeple today?"

"Huh? No. Me and my dad are shopping for a new TV. Whatcha doin'?"

Ronaldo sighed, waving a game guide in his hands like he already told Steven his future actions up until he was thirty. As dramatic as he could be sometimes, he should've considered being in a theater class or two with Jamie the Mailman. "I'm _only_ trying to research video games that have online multiplayer capability so I can play with my beautiful ohime-sama! We're still trying out things for our date nights, and I'm running out of sci-fi slash horror slasher thriller actions."

Steven scratched his head. "Well, I don't know about online multiplayers, but you can always play Smash? Anyone can play Smash if they can smash button-" Something suddenly clicked in his mind. "Wait…date night? You have a…girlfriend? Is she real?"

His eyes turned into stars again. Ronaldo lightly blushed, then sharply turned his gaze back to the video games. "Of course she's real! We have been in an unstoppable long-distance Skype relationship for two and a half weeks now. Her name's Jane and she is my demisexual, asexual social justice goddess…I'd die for her."

Shifting his eyes he pulled out his phone and quickly pressed several buttons on his touchscreen. "You know, as a half-mortal you don't deserve to lay an eye on even a photo of her, but. Uh. Your alien snerson side is worthy. She'd want you to see."

Steven's vision was overwhelmed with the phone. Then Ronaldo pulled it away a smidge, and he saw the familiar background of a Skype screenshot. A pale, freckled girl had one hand on the computer screen while her cheeks were filled while chewing something. Judging from the screenshot, it looked like a burrito. Steven pointed at her face, eyes lighting up with recognition. "Hey, Ronaldo, doesn't she live in Beach City?"

"Whaaaa?…"

"Yeah! When me and Connie went to see _Dogcopter 3_ , she was the one working at the ticket booth! Uh, why are you in a long-distance relationship?"

"Steven! Don't question the complexities of relationships!" Ronaldo snapped. "We have to be at least level seven to meet in person! Right now we're at level two, maybe level three depending on the day. But not today!"

"Oh, okay."

Ronaldo was at least right about relationships being complex. Steven was pretty sure that his parents had a lot of mysteries between them, between Greg's premature balding condition and Rose's involvement with the Gem Wars and everything. Garnet was a fusion of two gems. And Steven was pretty sure that he and Connie were somewhere in-between friends and datemates…he hoped.

Sometimes Ronaldo was a bigger enigma than any grand gem mystery, though.

A flatscreen whizzed past them, landing by their feet like a frisbee. Steven sweatdropped, praying to whatever higher powers in the universe that maybe, just maybe, it fell on its own and it wasn't Peridot's fault. Accidents happened every now and then, didn't they?

And then he saw Peridot walking in their direction with a bunch of wires crushed against her fist and his lunch dropped in his stomach.

"Steven! These televisions are just as flimsy as the one I broke!" she hissed, throwing the wires at his feet. "You might as well just keep the broken one. If your defective Pearl can't fix it, I might be able to do something."

"Hey, Pearl's not defective!"

"Riiiight. Then why can't she fix it?"

"Perido-"

His mouth was covered. If jaws could drop like a snake's, Ronaldo's jaw would be all the way down on the floor. His eyes were shining stars, and he began to breathe heavily. Oh, no. Steven and his dad could get around not being banned by Great Buy forever by paying for the broken television in payments, but it'd be harder to explain how their new alien frenemy killed the older Fryman boy. At the very least, he wouldn't be able to hang out with Peedee anymore.

Maybe even…be banned from getting frybits forever.

"Mmmmmf!" he shouted as Ronaldo took one step forward.

"Uhhh…hello, snerson!" Ronaldo greeted, voice slightly crackling. "Is this your first time here on Earth? Is Steven being a terrible tour guide? Do you sneeple wear underwear, and if so can you recommend me a pair that doesn't itch so much?"

Peridot stared blankly at them both. This was…an improvement. She let the last of the wires go before she regained her composure, which was the angriest frown she'd given in days. This was…not an improvement. "My name is Peridot," she replied. "Steven is doing his best despite his ridiculous incompetence, and no, we gems do not need to wear undergarment unless it boosts our specialized capabilities-hey, _get off me!_ "

Steven had no choice but to get behind her and place his hands around her waist, pulling against Ronaldo's grip. Ronaldo had both of his hands firmly grasped onto Peridot's right hand, Probably in an attempt for a mid-handshake…but Peridot made it clear that she did not like handshakes, so her hand was limp against his big, meaty fingers. The biggest goal now was to destroy nothing else in the store. "Ronaldo, you gotta let go!" he warned. "She has these spinny blade fingers that'll chop your fingers in half! She almost did it to my dad!"

"Yeah! Don't think I won't use them, either, earthling scum!"

" _zzzzzzz!_ "

"Steven, I have to make sure this handshake lasts at the cost of anything! I have to make sure to report this to my blog!"

"No, Ronaldo, don't be a hero!"

"Don't be an idiot clod."

"Leeeeet gooooo, Ronalllldooooo!"

"Neeeeeveeeeeer, Steeeeveeeennnn!"

 _pop!_

* * *

Lapis was laying on the couch reading a magazine when they came home. Peridot was the first to storm in, making her way straight for the bathroom. Along the way she smacked something against the floor. Steven was next, gently shutting the door while Lapis stood up on her feet and picked up the object, examining it closely. "Is this Peridot's arm?" she asked, pointing to it. "Steven, I thought you and your dad human were buying a TV! What happened?"

Steven motioned to the window with his thumb. "Dad's getting the TV out from the van. It took longer than expected, sorry."

Nodding, Lapis narrowed her eyes and slowly shoved the arm into Steven's hands. It wiggled in his grip, as if it were still attached. Steven placed it back on the floor as he met Lapis's gaze. She also pointed at the window. "And who's that?"

"Steeeeeeveeeeennnnn-"

"Oh, that's Ronaldo. He might be camping outside for a while. He likes Peridot."

"Did Peridot make a friend?"

The arm crept across the floor. They both stared at it in silence, and Steven sweatdropped. His dad was right - maybe it would've been better if they just left Peridot at Great Buy.

"Nope!"


	6. Chapter 6

_can't we all just get along?_

 _Fake teaser: Expressing feelings is bad. So is flooding the bathroom._

 _I have a slight plot direction for now, so I guess we'll wait on that canon tie-in for a while still. For now we have…plot development. idk._

* * *

"Yes, Peedee, he's still here…no, he's not bothering anyone…he has _medication?_ …yes, I'll remind him….oh, why is he here? Oh. Heh, well, funny story…oh, you'll hear it when he comes home? Okay…okay…okay…okay! I'll talk to you later! Byeeee!"

-click-

Steven placed his phone on the counter and buried his face in his hands, groaning. Whenever the Crystal Gems went out on longer missions, Garnet and Pearl expected him to watch the house and take care of things like a big boy. But where to begin, where to begin?

Ronaldo had been camping out down at the beach ever since the trip to Great Buy. He seemed really into being Peridot's friend, though she refused to even look at him, so he set up his camp area not far from the stairs and occasionally went into the house to recharge his laptop. Only problem was…he didn't exactly tell anyone where he was, and his family came super-close to filing a missing persons' report. Steven hoped they wouldn't stop serving him The Bits because of this.

Peridot was hard to get along with, as usual. No, more than usual because she had one malfunctioning limb enhancer now, leaving her with one scary, limb-enhanced arm and one short, admittedly cute arm. These past couple of days, she'd been in a sour mood, but Steven didn't fully understand why. She seemed perfectly capable to do anything, limb-enhancers or not.

"Because I'm inefficient without them, Steven!" she had snapped at him earlier today when he asked. "A proper Peridot is supposed to excel at all technological and engineering tasks. We're the brains, the science of the operation! I can't fulfill my tasks like…like…like _this_!"

And then she tossed him off his bed and shook the new TV, muttering curses in the Homeworld language.

Lapis was…he wasn't sure at all what words fit Lapis's mood. Probably somewhere between cloudy and stormy. She was still recovering, she dozed in and out of sleep, but there was something more to it. If Steven had to place a finger on this something, he'd say that Lapis didn't really want to be stuck on Earth. Just a hunch.

But he had to try to make this work. They were beach summer fun buddies, after all. Maybe they could be beach two seasons fun buddies if he tried hard enough.

His eyes bulged out from between his fingers. Oh, no. Speaking of trying hard enough, his brain tried hard enough to suddenly remember something. He darted across to the bathroom and hurriedly knocked on the door, making sure to take deep breaths so as not to panic. Not again. "Lapis? Lapis, are you okay?" he asked shakily. "I'm gonna open the door…please tell me you didn't flood the room again."

Hesitant, he reached out and twisted the knob, opening up the door just a crack. A trickle of water immediately rushed out and wet his feet. He groaned again, this time out of exasperation. Flinging the door open, he spread his legs apart and crossed his arms, furrowing his eyebrows. It was time for Serious Steven. "Lapis, I thought we had already discussed this! You're not supposed to flood the entire bathroom!"

Lapis was laying in the bathtub. The room was colored a clear, light blue from top to bottom, still with water other than the constant trickle. Luckily, as long as Lapis kept minimal concentration, the water wouldn't flood past the bathroom and destroy the entire lower floor, but it was up to Steven to wipe up whatever water damage she left in the bathroom…which he already had to do twice in the past week. Not the easiest task in the world. They shared a long glance before Lapis turned her head, indifferent. "Sorry. Being submerged helps me think."

 _sploosh!_ And the water rushed down through the bathtub and shower drains, leaving puddles everywhere. Steven sighed and walked over to her, avoiding the soggy rug so his feet didn't have to feel like mush. Leaning over the tub, he wrapped his hands around Lapis's neck and lightly pressed against her back in a weak hug. She tensed but gently patted his hands, and he smiled. There were better things to get angry over than this. "Well, don't worry about it too much. I'll clean it up eventually."

"Is there any reason why you're checking up on me now, then?"

"Oh, well, I have to check up on everyone while the Crystal Gems are gone! I'm the house leader when they're away. And…" Steven paused, scratching behind his neck. He knew she wasn't going to like to hear this next part, "and I wanted to see what the four of us could do tonight. Maybe eat dinner together?"

"Four of us? You mean us and Peridot, and that weird fry boy?"

"Yeah!"

"I think I'll pass, Steven. But thank you."

"Do you think you and Peridot will ever get along?"

"No."

"Oh."

Lapis sighed and squeezed his hand. The cloudiness or storminess or whatever bad mood she had on her face disappeared for a moment, replaced by a small smile of her own. "Can we cooperate? Well, yes, if we really had to, just like when we played Smash a few days ago. But it'll take a while before we can get along. Maybe never. Not everyone is like you and the Crystal Gems, Steven. She, weeeell…." She gulped, "…she's kinda evil, if you wanna put it bluntly."

"She's not evil! She's just misunderstood! I don't like Peridot much, either, but I'm sure if she just warms up to us eventually-"

" _You're_ the one who doesn't understand, Steven!" Lapis snapped. Splashing some water into the air, she slapped the ceiling and grunted, smacking her hands over her eyes. "You…not everyone can change to be good! Do you think that just because you rescued us from that big hunk of orange that we're gonna be best buddies and add to your stellar gem family?! You should give up on her! On _me!_ ….you should just…give up on us, Steven."

Steven recoiled from her, balling his fists at his sides. This was the final straw. "I won't give up on you!" he shot back, flushing. "And I won't give up on Peridot! If my mom and the Crystal Gems could turn good and find happiness on this planet, so can you! And it's okay if you and Peridot don't like each other! Garnet said it was okay if we can't get along with everyone! So…so…so don't give up on yourselves, either!"

"Steven, I-"

But he stormed off, almost colliding with Peridot as she was walking to the kitchen. She narrowed his eyes at him as he ran outside and slammed the door behind him, and when Lapis came out of the bathroom, she directed her confusion at her. "Hey, what's up Steven's rear end?"

* * *

"So, are your hot snerson sisters angry with you, too, Steven?"

Steven sunk into Lion's mane as much as he could without slipping into the other side where all his mother's cool treasure was. His pink fur felt cool and comforting against his head while they sunbathed. "Nah, I think it's the other way around. Me and Lapis had a fight, and Peridot's Peridot. I'unno, I just wanted us to have one good day while the Crystal Gems are gone."

Ronaldo lifted his head and looked at him. "That's rough, buddy. It's almost angsty enough for me to make an entry on my blog, but I have to keep the personal stuff as limited as possible. You understand, right?"

"Uh-huh."

"Me and Peedee fight a lot. He gets mad that I hog up most of our Internet's bandwidth, but he never really goes on the computer or his phone. He mostly just spends his off days on school work or playing the Nintendo 64, which admittedly is Nintendo's best console system to date. So, then, why does he need to fight with me all the time about the Internet? Sometimes I think it's a conspiracy."

The sunlight flashed over his glasses, and he coughed. "But sometimes when things get too bad, instead of going to our rooms, Dad forces us to do something together until we get along again. He says that sometimes it's good to cool off on your own, but other times you gotta do it with the other person to make sure you're on the same page."

"Does it work?" Steven asked.

"Uhhh, sometimes. Usually when we all go out for pizza. Otherwise we spend most of the time in silence."

"Well, that's…oddly comforting, actually. Thanks, Ronaldo."

"Yeah, well, y'know, I'm a genius."

Steven chuckled and shut his eyes, scratching Lion's mane. Going out for pizza would be a lot better than just bubbling in awkward silence until they started talking to each other again. From a short distance he could hear the faint sounds of the ocean rock back and forth against the beach, and it lulled him. They would get along eventually, he was sure of it.

" _Steeeeveeen!_ "

He opened one eye. From above Lapis and Peridot leaned against the stair rail, waving at them. He waved back while Ronaldo rolled off of Lion's back and ran towards Peridot. Usually they only had one Pizza Night a week, but they could make an exception for the sake of getting along.

Also they were all pretty terrible at cooking.


End file.
